YSeptember 22, 2004
wokays.ferstly,adam and mai.haha surely ull read ma blog ryte.it's a miracle cuz people dunt usually visit ma blog except for a few of ma frens here and ther..hehe nolah, i dunt have anythang against u people.i know tha whole story.maybe more than you do. i just prefer observin and seeing wat happens instead of saying anythang.
adam,when u called me i was half-asleep.so i was a lil sotong lah~ geez. and hey,im saying what i feel.i dunt care.it's ma shoutout. if she's hurt,why cant she talk to me instead. im not hurtin her.im just saying what i feel.u have to be a bitch at times.it's how situation is.seriously i didnt blogged totally about maisarah u know.abeen has past experiences too.which i dunt wish to elaborate. and i did experience a lil of shit like this.so im just being there for her.so lemme get thangs straight.clear all those misunderstandings.i have nothing against both of you.i just wanna see tha outcome of everythang.like go with tha flow and stuff.but what i said.i do not regret.thaT's how i feel.okay? it's gonna be weird lah.and simpang with us together i guess is gonna be..ummm long.to ma prediction.we will prob go there.but not together.yet.
ive realised something. im sad bout it but ill try to u noe come out wit reasons everytime.so that i wont feel so bad and all.i feel that we're drifting apart.haha.buti dunt think so lah~ maybe it's just ma emotions.playing games with me.but heck lah~ ill always think it's all due to olevels.but hey,alah,i swear i dunnoe how to elaborate lah~ im sad.haha.but i cant be sad now.i need to be ther for abeen just in case.i know shes strong.im here.just in case.
i think imma failure.haha but nah,i dunt think so.i got like lecture by dope.haha.asking rhetorical qns.haha this boy ah.haha thanx sweets for being ther fer me that day.and shaikh~ u too.and i miss aaron so much.i miss his crap,shiznets. saw him at simpang just now.he looked different.shall not elaborate on how he looked lah.
i must survive ma olevels.i can i noe i can.hahait's just now im not sure.after results and stuff.i hope im not dumb.i dunt wanna do badly.. :( i need sumwan.to motivate me.make me study.be there for me.not shine away from me.haha. i want a special sumwan whus gonna come along to pull me thru this shit.gawd.what am i saying.go thru wit me.not shine away.i guess ill have to find. and nufail baby...i miss you can. and mai and adam,i miss thoses times.
p.s. can sumwan please ask gawd to help shine tha light on me at thismoment.im like goin thru it maself sia.it's like sucky and stuff.okay? thanx people.
i love you like crazy.
*brownsugar* rant at